By Caro Syson
27 Jun 2022
Do you ever have one of those days where you just can’t be bothered?
Where the thought of doing what you have to do makes you want to climb back into bed and hide from the world?
Well, you’re not alone, and we all have days like that. Some days showing up is painful and hard, and the last thing we want to do. So if you’ve ever fallen victim to the allure of the comfy bed and not bothered showing up then know it’’s ok, and you can put your hand up high, as our hand is up too!
We’re human, we get stressed, overwhelmed, tired, the world we live in can be a gruelling one at times. We’re here for you, we know.
When you’re not feeling it, have you ever examined why you’re not feeling it? Do you have imposter syndrome, where you feel like you’re not qualified enough, or good enough to be doing what you’re doing? Has your self-care been lacking? Maybe you’re working all hours God sends but you haven’t scheduled any relaxation time, time for you.
There are a number of things that can leave you feeling like you don’t want to show up. Reflecting on what’s going on in your life can help you to put things in perspective and help you put things in place to overcome or even prevent feeling like hibernating on a regular basis.
If it’s self-care you need to work on, then make sure you’re eating well because our diets have a direct effect on our moods. Are you getting enough sleep? Lack of sleep will play a big part in not wanting to show up, or do you just need to take some time to schedule some relaxing self-care things?
Maybe turn your phone off a couple of times a week, jump in the bath, light some candles, play some relaxing music. Maybe learn to meditate or take a mindfulness class. A few minutes a day of self care can really help shift your energy back to wanting to show up.
We also have a couple of hacks that’ll help you to shake off the funk you’re in and hopefully get you wanting to show up again.
1. Are you committed?
If we’re not fully committed to something, it’s highly likely we’re not going to show up for it. Before you agree to do something, whether it’s relating to your business or your personal life, make sure you’re really committed before agreeing to it. If that means not replying straight away, that’s ok, give yourself time to make sure you want to commit.
Maybe you’ve been asked to coach a children’s football team on a Thursday evening, but you have a full day of personal training clients and know you’ll be shattered in the evening. It’s ok to say no if you’re not committed to it, there are other people that can give the team their full commitment, and that’s ok.
Perhaps you’ve committed to giving a talk to students learning your industry. You’re fully committed, but the imposter syndrome is kicking in and making you feel like not showing up. Don’t worry, this is common and we can help.
Grab a notebook and pen, ignore your ‘not good enough’ thoughts for a moment and write down a few notes about what you’re going to say, and plan your talk. When we have a plan in front of us it’s easier for us to see that we do know what we’re talking about, we are qualified to give this talk.
When we can see that actually we are qualified, when we can see there is a plan, it’s easier for us to show up.
2. Write a list of evidence
Another technique to overcoming imposter syndrome is writing a list of evidence against the imposter. Write how you are qualified to do what you’ve committed to. Or write down items that agree with your imposter syndrome then next to each item, write the evidence against that.
For example, you’re thinking ‘who are you’ to be able to write an article for a magazine about your industry, what do you know?
Next to that item, write down the evidence that goes against that negative thought. Your qualifications, your experience, the great results you get. At the end of the list you’ll find you’re more than qualified and the imposter syndrome can go back to bed, you don’t need him hanging around.
You can get back to committing to the thing you previously didn’t want to show up to, but now you do. Because you can. Because you’re awesome!
3. Forward thinking and future casting
Put your mind into the future ‘you’, the ‘you’ after the event you’re debating on not showing up to. How does that ‘you’ feel? Does he/she feel good about themselves? Does he/she feel a sense of achievement because they showed up and did the thing they committed to?
Imagining the rewards, the sense of achievement, and how the future ‘you’ will feel after the event, will help to shift your mind to a more positive state, creating the urge to show up.
That tip can apply to anything in your life. Maybe you want to lose some weight but you’re craving a double cheese pizza. Future cast yourself. How does the future YOU feel about the pizza? Does she feel good she devoured it? Or is she regretting eating it? Then make your decision from there.
Sometimes we just don’t want to work today. We’re not feeling it. We don’t want to deal with people. We don’t want to travel.
We just. Don’t. Want. To.
It’s ok to feel like that. Give yourself a moment to feel those feelings then future cast yourself. What does future ‘you’ look like if you cancel your appointments today? Is she happy? Or does she feel regret that she’s let people down?
What does future ‘you’ look like if you work today? Does she feel glad she got out of bed and showed up? Does she realise that it wasn’t as bad as she thought, and she felt much better after seeing her first client?
What do you want future ‘you’ to look like? Play around with the ‘Try it on strategy’ a mind game where you get to play, in your mind, what the different outcomes are, how it would feel to take different paths. Don’t spend too much time playing out different outcomes, just a few minutes while driving or in the shower, it will help you to get into the decision of showing up.
4. What needs to go?
Decide what your priorities are and make room for your number one priorities even when you don’t feel like it. By overloading your diary, it’s certain that you’ll not want to show up to some things.
Get ruthless with your lesser priorities and make sure you cut out the lower priorities to make room for the pressing items on your list. No one wants to be overloaded, no one feels good when they’ve got too much to do. Drop the lesser priorities for now and commit, focus, and plan for your higher priorities. Show up for the higher priorities
5. Make it fun
Maybe today you don’t feel like planning your social media content …… but you haven’t posted in a few days and you have nothing left to post.
So, make it fun. Put some music on, light a candle, pour a glass of wine, and grab your notebook. You’ve just tricked your mind that you’re about to do something fun or relaxing.
Now when you grab your notebook or laptop, make fun content, add in some humour, get creative with your graphics.
Maybe you don’t feel like working out, put on a movie, jump on your exercise bike, or treadmill, or execute the HIIT routine you want, the movie will take your mind off the workout, and your future you will thank you for it.
6. Turn it into a game
You don’t want to show up today, you have a lot to do and you just don’t want to do it. Write a to-do list and turn it into a game of ‘how many ticks can you get in a day’ game.
Every time you tick an item on your list you’ll get a surge of dopamine, your happy hormone, that will increase your happiness levels. Your feeling of not wanting to show up today can turn into feeling pumped, excited, and satisfied by a simple tick game.
And think how productive you’ll be. What reward will you give yourself for achieving everything on your list? Will you have a reward for each item or a big reward at the end of the day, week, month?
7. Get outside
And finally our last tip, one that will help to shift you energetically. Get outside. Go for a walk. Shake or dance around the garden. Even 2 minutes of jumping jacks can create an energetic shift from ‘Can’t be bothered,’ to ‘let’s do this!’
The state change can work wonders to move stuck energy and help you feel better.
We know it can be tough to show up when you don’t want to, especially after the few years we’ve all been through, but try and implement some of the tips above. We’ve tried them and can vouch that they work!
Let us know what tips you try, we’d love to hear your stories. Find us on instagram and facebook @pocketpa.gb